Dear Lindsay,

I appreciate you as much as the next guy, really I do. I've been following your young career for a while now and I think I've got all the GQ's you've been in and well...I really thought you where a fun girl and sometimes a good actress. But sweety, you've got a problem.

What's up with the rehab thing ? Was that for real ? It's OK to say you needed some time off in a fancy spa with a pool and people there to prepare fruit platters and fancy drinks with umbrellas in them...We all need some special "me" time.

If you really want to stop the whole drinking thing, move to an island or something for a year or two, lay low, stop going out so much - keep your cash and buy yourself a dog or something, go adopt an African orphan, that will surely set you straight...

Honestly, I'm guessing some tweeny girls must look up to you - I mean, kids have always looked up to movie stars but mainly because they were popular and rich and they got to go to premiers and fancy galas...not because they could get trashed and pass out all they want without having to worry about work the next day. You're throwing away the best thing that can be happening to you.

Now I know this might be because I've been going around telling everyone I've fallen in love with Leslie Feist but Lindsay, you still hold a place in my heart, it's just not the same, you're not that sweet loving freckled girl I remember so well. I like you a bit raunchy but not crazy alcohol doped raunchy.

Have fun in rehab (sigh), call me when you get out.

jeanpierre